Thursday, March 20, 2003

Two Gunslingers Soccer Match

"Two gunslingers, walked out in the street
And one said "I don't wanna fight no more"
And the other gunslinger thought about it
And he said, "yeah what are we fighting for?"

Imagine this: Iraqi soldiers will see our troops advancing on them and then Iraqi guys will say "Hey gunslingers! Let's play soccer instead" and our troops will say "Hey gunslingers! Let's play! But lay down your arms first" and then they will call CNN to make an order for 2 million soccer balls to be delivered to the desert of Iraq and CNN would get an exclusive on broadcasting the greatest soccer games the world had ever seen. And for the next 40 days the world will watch The Humanity at Play 24 hours a day . And it will be serious business. And those who don't like soccer will play basketball or cricket or baseball or they will play hide and seek (which is hard to do in a flat desert so it will require great creativity). And those who don't like games can play in the sand, make mudpies. And Iraqi soldiers will then show pictures of their wifes and sons to American soldiers who in turn will show them pictures of their loves ones and tell them about fresh baked pies in 24 hour diners on the outskirts of towns and then they will sing and tell stories around the campfires and it will be the greatest gathering of Humanity. Imagine One Million Soldiers playing soccer. Just Imagine. If I was a soldier in the desert this is what I would be imagining, that any moment now some Iraqi soldier will just shout "Hey gunslingers! Let's play soccer instead!" and then I won't have to kill him... and then I will not have to kill him... now. right now.

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